Am asteptat si am asteptat...Dar nooo.
Asa ca am facut eu thread-ul cu bancuri

N'joy

Doi aurolaci, ametiti rau, arunca un preot dintr-o clopotnitza... Preotul cade si moare.
Unul ii spune celuilalt: Io ti-am zis ca nu zboara, ca e preot! da` tu nu!!, "Batman"!!! "Batman"!!

El: Ce faci fetele? te plimbi? Va simteti bine?

Ea: Auzi ma, mamaia ta e tigan? Lasa ma ca am invatat azi noapte toata ziua!

El: Da tu ce ce te ocupi?

Ea: Sunt fotomodel, manechina si hobby-urile mele este inotul!

El: Esti intelectuala ha? Bine ma te pup...."ce gagica sa-mi bag picioarele!"

Once upon a time there was a female brain cell which by mistake
happened to end up in a man's head. She looked around nervously but it
was all empty and quiet.

"Hello?" she cried, but heard no answer.

"Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.

Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled
at the top of her voice,

"HELLO!!! IS THERE ANYONE HERE?"

Then she heard a very faint voice from far, far away:

"We're down here..."

tare nk

sec. eu am ras cu lacrimi:
o musca a intrat in urechea unui cal, si cand a iesit, calul nu mai era

sau...

Un om avea o vaca...si vaca n-avea nimic impotriva.

daca tot dam pe seci:

Adam shi cu Eva erau pe o stanca...
lui Eva ii era cald...
Adam io facut vant...

inca unu... asta e fain cand il zic live in romana ... dar sper sa mearga shi asha



80,000 blondes meet in the Kansas City Chiefs Stadium for a "Blondes
Are
Not Stupid" Convention.

The leader says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that
blondes
are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?"

A blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the
stage.

The leader asks her, "What is 15 plus 15?"

After 15 or 20 seconds she says, "Eighteen!"

Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then 80,000 blondes start
cheering, "Give her another chance! Give her another chance!"

The leader says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting
80,000
of you in one place and we have the world- wide press and global
broadcast
media here, gee, uh, I guess we can give her another chance."

So he asks, "What is 5 plus 5?"

After nearly 30 seconds she eventually says, "Ninety?"

The leader is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected
sigh -- everyone is disheartened - the blonde starts crying and the
80,000
girls begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GIVE HER ANOTHER
CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!"

The leader, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than damage,
eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance -- What is 2 plus 2?"

The girl closes her eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says,
"Four?"

Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 80,000 girls jump
to
their feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream... "GIVE HER
ANOTHER CHANCE!" "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!"

eu il stiam altfel ..

ca era unu si canta la un concert ..canta asta 2-3-4-5 melodii ..si la sfarsit publicu bis , bis bis .. mai canta asta inco data 2 melodii..lumea iara bis bis bis .. mai canta omu 2 melodii ... lumea iara bis , bis , bis .. si asta suparat tare de tot ..da cat vreti sa va mai cant ?

-PANA INVETI SA CANTI ...

Probabil il stiai asa ca era un alt banc

Microsoft V.S. GM

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times! as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Este important sa gasesti o femeie, care sa tina in frau gospodaria,
care stie sa gateasca si care are un job banos.
Este important sa gasesti o femeie, care te face sa razi, care te intelege si cu care poti sa vorbesti si sa discuti.
Este important sa gasesti o femeie, pecare te poti baza si care nu te minte.
Este important sa gasesti o femeie, care este buna la pat si care face sex cu placere si de cate ori vrei.
Este f.f.f. important ca aceste patru femei sa nu se cunoasca intre ele!

un client ajunge intr-un aprozar:
C: vreau si eu doua kile de cartofi, dar ambalati-i pe fiecare in parte va rog
V: mmmm bine
C: ah, mai vreau si un kil de portocale dar ,va rog, ambalati-le pe fiecare in parte
V: ..da
C: nu va suparati, astea ce-s?
V: mac, cretinule, nu e de vanzare !!

grupul decopii tampitzi care cred k yahoo se inchide saluta Zapp Share Free (c)

Adam si Eva sunt izgoniti din rai. La plecare, ei intreaba: -Doamne, cine va spala vasele? Dumnezeu le spune : -Va voi pune la o incercare. Va veti sui intr-un copac si voi da drumul la o pisica salbatica sa va chinuie. Cine va vorbi primul, acela va spala vasele toata viata. Zis si facut. Vine pisica si se urca pana la Eva, o zgaraie pe picioare, o musca, Eva, nici un cuvant. Trece pisica la Adam. Il zgaraie pe picioare, il musca, se ridica mai sus si observa intre picioare doi motocei. Pisica incepe sa se joace cu ei si la un moment dat, observa ca un soricel ce era ca mort, incepe sa se miste si sa creasca. Si-a luat atunci pozitia de asalt, dar cand sa sara, Eva a urlat: - Zât! fir-ai a dracului ! De atunci a ramas lege: femeia spala vasele

p.s.l. e doar un banc, nu-i lege ok? jumi juma >:p

Femeia Perfecta:
1.Da, inghit, imi place la nebunie gustul, mai da-mi.
2.Esti sigur ca ai baut suficient?
3.Ah, ce plictisita sunt. Hai sa facem dragoste.
4.N-ar trebui sa fii la bar acum cu prietenii tai?
5.M-am decis ca de-acum incolo sa merg goala prin casa.
6.Ce sexy esti cand esti mahmur.
7.Prefer sa stau acasa, sa ne uitam la un meci decat sa ma duc la cumparaturi cu prietenele mele.
8.Hai sa ne-abonam la revista Playboy.
9.Ti-ar place sa ma vezi cum o ling pe prietena mea cea mai buna?
10.Hai sa iesim prin oras ca sa te uiti la curul altor femei.
11.Iubitule, vecina iar face plaja goala pe balcon, vino sa vezi
12.Stiu ca sunt foarte stramta acolo dar hai sa mai incercam o data

oo akasha
ai prins glas draga?
si ce glas

tare ...
oare exista astfel de femeie ...daca da tre sa fie urata ca dracu

tot mai tare ala cu adam & eva